“What Does this Experience Remind You Of?”
April 7th, 2020 by admin
Photo Credit: Mary Moon Photography
This is the question I was asked by my teacher/transformative coach last week after I shared with him, in a storm of emotion and a shower tears, my worst fears and deepest grief and anger, regarding my then-perception of the circumstances and future, surrounding what we are calling COVID-19.
When I had cried all of the tears that needed to be cried, we moved into guided breath work, which allowed my nervous system to shift out of fight-or-flight. From a place of calm and present moment awareness, what appeared within the space of the inquiry, were some traumatic memories that seemed unrelated to my current emotional state and my perceived state of the world; but after some exploration and release/integration work, what became clear was that it was all, in fact, the same thing.
I was not experiencing reality, but instead, living in the memory of past trauma and in the interpretations that I had made about myself in relation to those traumas.
Those early life experiences had left me feeling victimized, feeling unable to trust authority figures in my life, feeling as though I was in trouble or always about to be in trouble, whether it was warranted or not; feeling as though it was me against the world, feeling cut off from love, and powerless…
….and I was superimposing all of those limited self-interpretations from the past, onto the current circumstances and onto my projections of the future.
The experience was deeply painful and frightening, just as those traumas had been.
And, of course, I was mistakenly assuming the current circumstances to be the cause of my current experience.
The fact is, however, that we can only ever experience the thoughts we are holding in mind and believing to be true, in any given moment. This is the simple, and easily misunderstood, nature of experience.
Experience is an inside job.
Circumstances do not cause our experience.
Our experience/belief is already in place. Circumstances only reveal what is already present—what we already hold to be true about ourselves…what is unresolved in us.
How we view ourselves and the world, is how we experience ourselves and the world.
So, if your experience is one of fear, lack, limitation, separation, sickness, victimhood, powerlessness, etc., what is happening is that your emotions (through the body) are simply informing you of how you are viewing yourself.
In other words, your emotions are not informing you about the state of the world, but about the quality of your state of mind.
Thoughts and beliefs are unconscious, and without objective assistance, most people are rarely able to recognize, in the moment, how these thoughts and beliefs—these memories replaying—are coloring their “right now” experience.
I have been on a personal growth journey for last two decades and have been highly engaged in cultivating this awareness that I teach, over the last half decade. I continue to be humbled by and appreciative of the layers of illusion that continue to surface, which by the way, often initially catch me off guard and feel utterly regressive; and I remain deeply committed to doing my Inner Work and having transformative space held for me on a regular basis.
Ironically, “what does this remind you of,” was the very question I had asked a client earlier in the week, after she shared with me, the fears and projections around COVID-19 that she was feeling overwhelmed by.
I could see and held space for her to experience (not just conceptualize), how she was innocently and unconsciously reliving the past and re-creating a traumatic experience for herself now, and we had a beautiful session that ended in her deeply experiencing her innate wellbeing.
When it came time for me to burn through more layers of illusion later in the week, and in doing so, step even more into my role of being a reflection of Divine Presence in this world and for my clients and loved ones, I was deeply grateful to have my teacher/transformative coach to hold space for me.
It doesn’t matter how “woke” we are or how long we’ve been on our spiritual or healing path…
Being in the presence of someone who is grounded in Divine Presence and can support us in seeing our experience and ourselves clearly, adds a completely different element and offers a level of healing and expansion that is not accessible to us on our own.
Are you able to see, in your moment-to-moment experience, where the experience of stress, suffering, worry, anxiety, anger, confusion, feeling out of control, fear of the future, etc., is actually coming from?
Do you know how your experience is being created from moment-to-moment, or are you living your life based on a limited view of yourself and memories replaying?
Are you living in the relief and infinite potential of The Now, or in the pain and hopelessness of the past?
The feeling always lets you know.
Next time you find yourself caught up in your own personal, thought-created hell, I invite you to slow WAY down, and take at least six slow, deep belly breaths—in the nose, out the mouth.
If you need to spend more time settling your mind and nervous system, I invite you to try my free Present Moment Meditation, as well as Alternate Nostril Breathing.
When your mind has settled, please ask yourself the question, “what does this experience remind me of?”.
Notice the first memories that arise. Whatever comes up is pointing you to what is unresolved in you that is asking for resolution now.
These memories point us to the lost and frightened aspects of our personality that are begging for unconditional love and radical acceptance.
This is how we retrieve the lost parts of our soul and come back to our innate sense of wholeness, wellbeing, and perfection—through awareness of how our experience is being created + radical acceptance and SO much love and tenderness with ourselves and with ALL aspects of our experience.
Only when we are willing to be with and love the fragmented and lost parts of our soul, do we get to experience what is actually true about us and about Life.
Only when we are willing to be with and love the unloved parts of ourselves/our experience, do we get to grow beyond where we are now, into the highest and best (and healthiest) version of ourselves, regardless of circumstance.
The path is clear. It is wide open. It always has been.
Circumstances, emotion, sensation, and experience are all temporary and do not change what is changeless, which is your wellbeing, your perfection, and your connection to All Life.
Whether or not you experience your wellbeing, your perfection, and your unity with All That Is, depends entirely upon your perspective, not upon circumstances.
I would love to support you in experiencing a healing and expansive shift in perception, if you are ready and willing to see things differently and clearly.
At this time, my Transformative Coaching sessions and programs are “pay what you can afford.” This offer is for everyone, including those of you who have worked with me in the past. I am offering single sessions and longer-term programs.
If you are tired of being tossed around in the infinite ocean of thought-created illusion and distortion…
If you are ready to stand on solid ground and build upon a solid foundation…
If you are ready to work WITH ever-changing circumstances and WITH all aspects of your experience as an ALLY in the refinement and actualization of your greatest purpose and happiness in life…
Please reach out to me and fill out a clarity form.
I also invite you to join my FREE Enlightened Wellness Facebook group for deeper connection and support.
You were made for these times, which are inviting you to grow and expand in ways you likely never imagined or thought possible.
I hope this message serves you deeply in some way.
Loving you and sending blessings to you and your loved ones during this time, which can be experienced either as a time of great contraction or as a time of great awakening and expansion.
We get to choose. We are so blessed.
Angie King-Nosseir MS, RDN, LD
Transformative Life & Spiritual Coach | Functional Medicine Nutritionist | Ceremonialist
Gourmet Healer, LLC
Student Journey Director
Transformative Coach Institute